Mental Preparations for My First Race

While riding today, I realized that I’ve put a lot of pressure on myself to do well in the race this weekend. It’s dangerous to do so, because it is just my first race and it’s one that, despite my having successfully finished before, is on a course entirely ill-suited to me.

So in classic Bob fashion, I’m writing out my excuses (to myself, my greatest critic) in advance to avoid any disappointments later.

1. My reason for cycling again after a long time off was simply to do the long, epic rides I most enjoy. I started riding faster just so I could do those more quickly and comfortably, and any racing that I do is extra and unexpected. I’ve said this before, in fact when I started cycling the first time, and I quickly became obsessed with racing. But I’ve got plenty else to console myself with if cycling doesn’t become my full-time activity this time.
2. My worth as a person does not depend on how I do in this race. Most sane adults do not spend their Saturdays racing around local neighborhoods on bicycles, dressed in spandex and eating fossilized energy bars. It’s all right if some of the other insane ones do it better than me.
3. I, like hopefully all other non-full-time-professional cyclists, am doing this for the enjoyment of the sport. If it is not enjoyable, it’s ok to stop doing it.

With those ground rules in place, it’s easy to set my goals for this first race:

1. Start it — always the most difficult thing for me, and the thing I’ve really been aiming for. I never said “I really want to finish a race again” — I said, “I really want to race again.”
2. Stay safe — no stupid crashes.
3. Have fun

Those rules make it entirely acceptable for me to pull out of the race as soon as the starting gun goes off, if I decide I’ve had enough fun. Of course, knowing my history I’ll probably try to stick around a bit longer, but it’s important to know that I don’t have to. Even though the race cost me 43 freaking dollars to enter, it’s my “freaking” money, not my team’s or sponsor’s, and it’s up to me to define successful usage of it.

For me, that puts me on the start line tomorrow at 4:10 pm Pacific Time (thoughts and prayers appreciated at that time). Anything further is icing on the cake.